Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

Using an on/off ramp to pass is perfectly acceptable when when freeway traffic drops below 10 m.p.h.

Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and apparently not enforceable in most metro areas.

Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over, doesn't mean that the driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster if he was in your spot.

Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic.

Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire.

Throwing litter on the roads adds variety to the landscape, keeps existing litter from getting lonely and gives Adopt-a-highway crews something to clean up.

Everybody thinks his or her vehicle is better than yours, especially pickup truck drivers with stickers of Calvin peeing on a Ford, Dodge, or Chevy logo.

Learn to swerve abruptly. Cities are a great place to learn high-speed slalom driving thanks to state DOT's (Dept. of Transportation), which put potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.



It is traditional for city drivers to honk their horns at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.

These would be good advice for people who want their cars wrecked and their Pontiac Safari wagon parts broken to pieces.